Underdark Bath Salts
From Underdark Anthropological Notes by
Emile the Wayward Bard
To surface dwellers, or ‘Surfies’ as the
denizens of the Underdark call them, the manners and customs of the peoples of
the world below may seem inscrutable. Vendettas may be carried out in cold
blood in a gnomish city before the very noses of guardsmen, but woe to the
sticky fingered traveler who steals from a shop in their bailiwick! Similarly,
the only time the various bipedal tribes cease slaying, enslaving, or
exploiting one another seems to be when an outsider breaks some minor custom,
then they band together with unbreakable oaths of loyalty, unswerving devotion,
and unbeatable cunning until the interloper is brought low before going back to
their mutual massacre.
Come to think of it, in some ways they may
not be so different from the surface kingdoms…
One Underdweller custom that Surfies would
do well to know is that of communal baths. Underfolk love their hot water, and
will take any opportunity to slip into one of the myriad geothermal pools that
dot the underscape and soak away the worry and bother that comes with living in
a permanently dark labyrinth of endless caverns brimming with carnivorous
monsters and cruel races. Bathing in such a pool soothes the mind and has minor
restorative properties for the body (removes stun or confusion effects OR gives
one healing surge or cure light wounds, usable once per day, water loses
potency when removed from the pool).
Such bathing spots are governed by a tacit
set of rules against bloodshed or mayhem, which is believed to sully the waters
and reduce their healing properties. It is not uncommon to see races lined up
patiently waiting for their turn to take a dip, unconsciously placing
themselves in an order balancing time or arrival with place in the hierarchy of
Underdark races. Gear is left undisturbed, for stealing from a bather is a
taboo none would dare break.
Breakers of this bath truce can expect to
find themselves set upon by inconvenienced hominids, and refused service or
even entry to Underdark communities.
Besides knowing the rules, it is useful if
not even life-saving to know the bathing habits of Underdark races. Many
underfolk carry bathing salts or powders that give addition benefits and
sprinkle these in the waters before entering. The salts usually dissipate with
1 to 4 hours, but the effects last much longer for the bathers. Here are a few
of the most commonly known Underdark bathing salts:
Drow Dip – Used by Drow and Ettenfolk, this
grayish powder is made from a mixture of dried spider venoms, to which these
races are immune. Dipping in the mixture keeps minor vermin and pests away for
24 hours or until washed clean. If a pest such as a rot grub, giant tick, carrion
crawler of something similar tries to feast on the bather, it must save vs. poison
or die for every attack it makes. Any creature not Drow or Ettenfolk bathing in
Drow Dip must make the same roll. Drow Dip is sold in Drow cities and fetches a
fair price due to the difficulty of mixing.
Dwarf Dusting – Used by Dwarves, Duergar,
Deep Ones, Gnomes, Sniblerlfiblin, and any similar industrious underfolk. This
sparkling powder is made of crushed gemstones and minerals, and bathing in it confers
a protective covering on the bather’s skin. The effect is as a Stoneskin or
similar spell and lasts half a day or until washed off. Races other than the
aforementioned are unused to moving with the extra dermal layer, and thus move
with difficulty (minus 1 to Dex) and also inadvertently wear the protection off
quicker, in 1 to 6 hours. The Dusting is horrendously expensive and usually
only carried by dwarves on royal business traveling through dangerous
underlands.
Kobold Kreme – This disgusting olive
coloured crème is made from oils and unguents made from Kobold bodily waste and
fermented entrails of certain animals, and each kobold tribe has its own
special recipe for the kreme. The kreme seeps into the bather’s pore and makes
them inedible to creatures, who must make a moral roll or save as against a
fear spell when they smell or taste the kreme. Non kobolds who attempt to bathe
in the kreme for some insane reason must make the same saves. The effect lasts
2 days to a week, in which time other hominids will avoid the kremed, who will
also be refused entry in any respectable community or establishment. The kreme
isn’t worth anything.
Zombie Bath Salts – Underdark necromancers
created this white ash that has two main effects – it keeps the undead fresh
(heal any damage taken OR gain one extra hit dice), and also makes living
subjects susceptible to suggestion (as a charm spell). The effects last a week,
after which undead return to normal and the living throw off the effects of the
susceptibility. Unscrupulous slavers have also been known to lure unwary
travelers into bathing in the salts by use of a zombified pool party of rotting beauties. The salt is
made from elements grotesque and arcane, and fetches a decent price among
slavers and death wizards. However, being caught using the salt on unsuspecting
bathers usually results in an instant death sentence carried out instantly by whoever
is near at hand and anyone else within earshot.
