Mountains and Valleys and the 30 Day Challenge

There is an old Japanese saying, 'yama ari tani ari' (There are mountains and valleys), which basically means everything has its ups and its downs. I am approaching a mountain in my work and studies, so my blogging will be low for the next month or two. Expect maximum a post a week.

I was glad that the 30 Day Challenge ignited my interest and enthusiasm. As much as I joked about its non-OSR taxonomy, I found it a great community building exercise for the OSR, and made me feel part of something while giving my mind something to chew on.

Anyway, all this blogging has revved up my writing muscles to where I feel I can blast through this next knot of work. I still have lots of gaming projects - finish my Stormbringer adventure 'Spiders & Angels', re-do my Palladium patch, playtest my DIY Robotech, and publish my D&D houserules (which will form the engine of Iceships & Inuit, my very own heartbreaker), among others. Once (If?) I pass my final mid-November work deadline I'll take a little break from everything and then find my way back here.

Until then, keep reading, writing, and most of all, gaming.

Tedankhamen

Ever Wonder Why Your Runeweapon is Trying to Kill You?

In my experience, runeweapons are too often poorly run by the DM, and give an unfair power boost to one character without any drawbacks. As I said in an earlier post, “Basically, if a player is happy to get a rune weapon, you’re running it wrong.” Since Elric’s Stormbringer is the model for rune weapons, they should be equally treacherous and perilous to the wielder. What follows is some tables to determine your runeweapon’s secret agenda, the overt power it can use on behalf of its wielder, and the covert power it holds in reserve to advance its own schemes.

The tables are descriptive and system-free so as to allow easy use in any system.

RUNEWEAPON SECRET AGENDA. Roll 1d12.

1) Revenge! The weapon seeks to destroy the foe of its last wielder. This foe is at least twice as powerful as the current wielder and has minions or allies equal in strength to the player characters. It cares not whether its wielder wins or loses, just that the battle continue.

2) Return! The weapon seeks to return to its last wielder. To determine former wielder’s location, roll 1d6 = 1 Wandering amnesiac somewhere in the world 2 Trapped in hell 3 Lost on another plane 4 At the deepest level of a dungeon 5 Imprisoned by the ruler of the land 6 In plague-infested City of Beggars.

3) Immolaton! The weapon seeks its own destruction, and doesn’t really care if the wielder is taken along for the ride. Roll 1d6 to see the only way it can be destroyed = 1 Thrown into the lava of Mount Badoom 2 Frozen and cracked by the Witch of the Wastes 3 Reforged by the King of the Deep Dwarves 4 Sucked dry of dweomer by an Enchanteater 5 Thrust into a Nullstone in the Faerie Realm 6 Skewering the Lord of the Undead.

4) Armageddon! The weapon seeks to bring about the End of the World! If the PCs are trying to stop this, the weapon will thwart them and aid their foes, or else set the chain of actions for Ragnarok in motion.

5) War! The weapon thrills at battle and will always seek to drag its wielder into any altercation it can, the larger the better. It will seek to persuade or kill a cowardly wielder.

6) Deicide! The weapon seeks to kill all gods and demigods. It will actively seek out the nearest target and commence hostilities regardless of the wielder’s intent or abilities.

7) Freedom! The weapon is a bound demon, and seeks escape from its current shape. Roll 1d6 to see how it can escape = 1 Exorcism by Great Leader of the largest Church in the land 2 Trading places with another soul using a Spirit Gem obtained from the Lichking Lair 3 Being destroyed (see Immolation above) 4 Undergoing purification in the hidden shrine of the Scarlett Swordmaidens who slay all men and enslave all women on sight 5 Striking the Great Golden Gong jealously guarded by the Fighting Tiger Monks of the Hidden Temple of Song Ho 6 Bathed in the acid blood of a freshly slain 7-headed Hydragon.

8) Allegiance! Will try to bind the wielder to the same force it serves. Roll 1d6 – 1 Law 2 Chaos 3 The Balance 4 Hell 5 Heaven 6 Itself!

9) Home! The weapon seeks to return to its home, and will desert the wielder should it get there. Roll 1d6 = 1 Armory of The Entropy Lords at the End of Time 2 In the hand of the Eight Armed Death Goddess Khali 3 With the Deep Dwarves who dwell below Mount Badoom 4 In the Tomb of the Hero Beneath the Hill from whence it was stolen 5 In the hidden shrine of the Scarlett Swordmaidens who slay all men and enslave all women on sight 6 In the Plane of Things were people don’t exist and all objects are sentient.

10) Nemesis! The weapon has an identical opposite wielded by another hero somewhere. The weapon can feel where its nemesis is and nudges its wielder towards a confrontation with it. It cares not whether its wielder wins or loses, just that the battle continue.

11) Blood & Souls! The weapon feeds on the flesh and spirit of those slain with it, and must feed upon a dozen souls every fortnight or turn on its wielder.

12) Roll twice and apply both. If the same agenda is rolled again, substitute with the next down the list.

RUNEWEAPON BASE ABILITIES & RESTRICTIONS

All runic weapons share certain basic abilities.

1.        They can either do maximum damage or roll double the amount of dice for damage.

2.        They cannot be thrown away or destroyed, and will magically appear back in the wielder’s sheath.

3.        They cannot be surprised, and will automatically attack first against surprise attackers.

4.        They will kill all opponents, and will refuse to do stunning damage, instead always going for lethal hits.

5.        On a fumble, they automatically attack the closest ally of the wielder, some say out of jealousy.

6.        In addition, they have one Overt Power which they usually let the wielder know about and use, and one Covert Power which they normally keep to themselves and employ when it furthers their aim. Weapons can withhold or use either type of Powers at any time so long as it furthers their aims.

7.        Runeweapons can talk, but only do so the moment they slay their wielder.

OVERT POWERS Can be used once per session. Roll 1d12.

1) Blind – The weapon creates a dazzling sparkle that temporarily blinds 1-4 foes instead of an attack.

2) Elemental Attack – The weapon can cause an attack. Roll 1d6 = 1 Flame Burst (damage and item destruction) 2 Wind Blast (damage, blindness & knock back) 3 Water Punch (damage & drowning) 4 Rock Barrage (damage & concussion) 5 Lightning Bolt (damage & blindness) 6 Ice Dagger (damage & immobility).

3) Celerity – The weapon doubles the wielder’s speed and attacks.

4) Vorpality – The weapon breaks through mundane weapons, armor and shields. It can also negate the effects of magic armor.

5) Berserker – The weapon makes the wielder immune to all pain, fear, and sleep effects, and can fight until literally hacked to pieces.

6) Summon Allies – The weapon summons the undead corpses of the last creatures it slew to fight at its side.

7) Elemental Shield – The weapon can make a shield of one type of element that nullifies its opposite. Roll 1d6 = 1 Flame Buckler (vs plants or flesh) 2 Wind Target (vs arrows) 3 Water Wall (vs fire or insects) 4 Rock Wall (vs charging creatures) 5 Energy Field (vs firearms) 6 Ice Blockade (vs reptiles).

8) Duplication – The weapon can make 1d6 duplicates of the wielder appear to confuse its enemies.

9) Vampire – The weapon steals vitality from foes it kills to heal the wielder.

10) Levitate – The weapon can slowly lift the wielder, or slow their fall.

11) Recall – The weapon can be thrown or launch itself to attack an enemy in sight then return to the wielder’s hand.

12) Roll twice and apply both. If the same power is rolled again, substitute with the next down the list.

COVERT POWERS Can be used once per session. Roll 1d12.

1) Intangibility – The weapon can pass through solid objects, dropping through floors, hiding in pillars, etcetera.

2) Invisibility – The weapon can pass from sight, although it stays in the same place.

3) Charm Person – The weapon takes control of an NPC and has them do its bidding for a day.

4) Teleport Self – The weapon instantly disappears in one spot and reappears in another in the same building, dungeon or forest.

5) Polymorph Self – The weapon takes on the appearance of another object. Roll 1d6 = 1 Old rusty shield 2 A pair of boots 3 A dead rabbit 4 A head of lettuce 5 A spinning wheel 6 A bear trap.

6) Insect Swarm – The weapon summons 1d10x100 insects who attack anyone it chooses.

7) Wall of Blades – The weapon is surrounded by a whirling wall of magical blades who slice anyone attempting to pass through them.

8) Illusion – The weapon creates an illusion in the mind of all onlookers. Either reroll on this table and use the result as the illusion or make up a suitable one yourself.

9) Animate Objects = All objects in the room come to life and do the weapon’s bidding for one day. Curtains can strangle, chairs kick, and tables ram foes.

10) Fire Body – The weapon sprouts a pair of legs, arms, and head made of flame that can carry it around, pick up inflammable objects, and attack foes.

11) Demon Servant – The weapon summons a demon servant who will do one task for it. Roll 1d6 for demon type = 1 Imp, weak but can fly 2 Satyr, equal to men but can Mesmerize with its pipe playing 3 Hellhound, larger than men with flame breath 4 Firedrake, great fire-breathing flame serpent with wings 5 Balrog, strong, winged and flamewhip wielding 6 Flame princess, kind yet can steal the heart of any man who then immolates himself in her arms.

12) Roll twice and apply both. If the same power is rolled again, substitute with the next down the list.

30 Day Dance Finale

30 Best DM

I’ve been lucky enough to have two ‘best’ DMs who show equally how different DMing styles can still make for a great game. Fred was my first long-term DM back in the early 90s, and was a technically brilliant game master. He knew every rule, had the adventure set in his head, and gave us a mathematical breakdown of the chances for every action we proposed. He was so good that I thought D&D a perfectly balanced and coherent system, until the 2000s when I went back and read my old RC to find it was a bit creaky in places. If Fred had any failing, it was that the gameworld as such was just a backdrop for the characters and the dungeon. Towns were nameless as were most NPCs, and served only to give us a place to procure or sell items and stash our booty. I am not sure if any of my characters even had names.

It was the 90’s, and we had no clue what we were missing. I knew lots of groups like us.

Last year I played a few sessions in Justin’s Vaults of Ur, and his style is almost the antithesis of Fred’s. Justin’s gameworld is rich and alive, every character has a name, and the actions of the PCs have repercussions on the web of power relations between groups in Fort Low, the Ruins and the Hive. On the rules side, Justin hand waves, or seeks input from players, or allows votes on houserules. He has also gone through a few rulesets for the same game – from a modded Labyrinth Lord when I played, to Stars Without Number by the latest reports. Justin’s DMing style immerses the players in his world – although I jumped in mid-campaign, I learned the party was intent on traveling to Orc Heaven to rescue the soul of their comrade-at-arms, Ripper. Since I had rolled up an orc, I immediately proposed my character as Ripper’s little brother, Digger, and joined the adventure (which inspired the art that graces this blog).

And I think that is what the OSR gives us (or rather asks of us) – to replay these old games, but add in the life experience and depth we missed when we were young. If you want to become someone’s best DM, know the rules without being a slave to them, and immerse them in a world grown from the seeds of your own imagination and experience.

OSR 30 Day Probation – 25 to 29

25 Fave Magic Item

A well-played Runesword is without doubt my favorite magic item. I stress “well-played” because all too often rune weapons are run poorly by DMs who don’t want to strip away a player’s agency. Taking Michael Moorcock’s Stormbringer as the model for the runeblade, we see that making the hero a pawn of fate is exactly what a runesword is intended to do. This is why in D&D runeweapons had their own Intelligence and powers the DM was supposed to keep secret from the players and use to undermine and manipulate them. The French rpg Bloodlust actually has the weapons themselves as characters, while even games like Stormbringer and the old Palladium FRPG had better depictions of the duplicity and menace of rune weapons. Basically, if a player is happy to get a rune weapon, you’re running it wrong.

26 Fave Nonmagic Item

Iron spikes, how do I love thee?

Let me count the ways:

Stopping doors for sleep at night

Or opening them to let in light

Dropped down a well to gauge a fall

Tapped in at intervals for climbing walls

For picking locks with DM’s permission

Or thrown to get rust monster attention

These examples are but a few

Of the reasons why I do love you

27 Character You Want To Play in Future

I’ve never sat down and just played a mage. This is partly because I dislike the vulnerability at lower levels, and partly because I find the D&D spell system an unwieldy and Byzantine nightmare. I figure that although my impressions are correct in general, I may have missed out on some insights by not having given the mage its due. I guess that’s my New Year’s resolution – play a mage in the next game of D&D I sit down at.

Whenever that will be. Sigh…

28 Character You Will Never Play Again

Probably a ranger, because although I love the IDEA of the class, the execution always leaves something to be desired. Either his outdoor skills are useless in the dungeon, or he’s out of his element in the city, or on another plane, etc etc. I once played a ranger who was a failed druid, and that is now how I always see rangers – nature lovers who were just not good enough to unlock the mystical bond with nature they needed to protect it.

29 The Number You Always Roll on a d20

Thirteen or twenty, rarely anything in between. Sounds like my life – some unlucky setbacks, no major fails to date, and the occasional big win.

Hoorah!

The Heart of Dorkness Day 23-24

23 Least Favorite Monster

I touched on this earlier, but plant monsters suck. Or more accurately, I have no idea how to DM them.

With any other monster, they move as do the PCs, and so encounters are a collision of forces. Plants… not so much. They’re just there. If you enter the garden/jungle/arboretum, you have willingly stepped into their territory. Most murderhobos at this point go Lieutenant Colonel Kilgore and tell the DM they’re on double secret alert and start dropping napalm everywhere. If anyone wants to share how they DM plants, feel free to tell me below.

Although I probably still won't use 'em....

24 Favorite Energy Whatnow?

This is some reeeeal non OSR post-2E sheeot going on with this question. Alright, I’ll let Johnny Rotten reply for me:

HERE

A Day Late & A Dollar Short – 30 Day Thingamajig, 19-22

19 Fave Plant/Elemental

Plant or Elemental? Plemental? I think Shambling Mound (a la Swamp Thing) is the only thing that fits this definition. I also think whoever started this 30 Day OSR Hot Mess might have wanted to save some monster categories for next year. ; )

Oh well, let’s go with plant monster. Can’t beat Myconid (mushroom men). They’re there underground, minding their own business, tending to their mushroom fields, then someone pisses them off and BAM spore attacks, healing shrooms, etc etc. Fun stuff.

I always had problems DMing ‘normal’ plant monsters – tell players their characters are in a garden or jungle and they insist they’re always on alert, or start lobbing flaming oil or chopping at every vine. Besides having a stationary plant monster guard a treasure or small passageway (and again being burnt out), I never found much use for them.

20 Humanoid/Natural/Fey

Again with the multiple post-2e monster taxonomy. I dunno what ‘natural’ even signifies, and as a proud grognard I ain’t about to find out.

Let’s go with fairies, specifically Sprites. Aside from the good soft drink associations, whenever a sprite randomly cursed a player character back in the day I felt like D&D was actually fulfilling its promise of emulating fantasy literature and escaping its wargame roots. Alas, the cure was often a few thousand GP to the local cleric, when a quest would have so much more fun and added magic to the playing experience. Oh well, when I DM I try to put as much unexplainable magic and wonder back in my games, and quests to break enchantments beat the vending machine mentality of getting an X level poobah to cast a spell any day of the week.

21 Dragon

I disremember if this existed in D&D, but I loved the Shadow Dragon from Darksword Adventures (remember that paperback-sized game by Hickman & Weiss based on the novels? Always wanted to run/play that…). As the colors multiplied, D&D dragons kind of lost their ethereal, force-of-nature quality, and became another set of attacks and abilities. Shadow dragons were part of shadow, and shot down stars from under their wings if I remember correctly. Good, atmospheric stuff.

22 Fave Monster

Favorite monster overall as opposed to all the categories of monsters we’ve traipsed through already? Yeesh!

OK, my favorite monsters are those that the players cannot beat in a stand up fight. In video games like Resident Evil (specifically 2 & 3), zeds and lashers soon lose their menace, but those hulking horrors in trenchcoats that can’t be stopped? When you hear their BGM your pulse races. Ditto The Thing for movies – you can kill parts of it, but if even a cell escapes, the world is toast. The old Deities & Demigods even made gods mortal by giving them stats, which I found a terrible thing, and would use to represent avatars, not the deities themselves. The book also gave killable versions of Lovecraftian & Elric Mythos’ creatures, while Chaosium kept them in their primal, unbeatable and thus more fearsome form. In Stormbringer, if you see a herd of colossal metal oxen come your way, hear the dread voice of Bellbane in the mist or the tentaculared horror of the Kyrenee, you run, regardless of whether you have demon arms and armor or not. Even in Call of Cthulhu, access to the awesome destructive power of guns and explosives will most likely only hasten your demise.

These unbeatable threats not only keep the thrill and uncertainty alive, they also force players to be more creative in finding solutions and can also further the narrative. Want to stop a Tarrasque ravaging the kingdom? You could quest for a Wish and all the other junk you need to kill it, but you might need to find a sage first to find this stuff out, or you could just try to lure it through a gate to another plane, or find its natural enemy (a la the Grahluk and Elenoin from Elric), or any other number of solutions. As a DM, just keep quiet and let players run through a number of plans – they may surprise you and add some invaluable, magical adventure to the game. Look at the end of Death Frost Doom – no way the players can fight what they’ve unleashed head on, so now they’re forced to think waaaay out of the box to solve the problem they’ve caused.

(Or move to another continent and take up mushroom gardening…)

Month O' Blogging Defiance – 16, 17, 18

16 Favorite Aberration

The nomenclature here is a bit puzzling, and I suspect that players of later editions are more conversant with the rigid stratification of creature types and templates, but I take an aberration is a monster whose very alienness marks it as monstrous. In that case, although the otyugh and aboleth are strong contenders, I’d have to go with the unsung doppelganger.

Dopplegangers aren’t that tough head on, but add in their shapeshifting, the magic items they’ve stolen or claimed from victims, and the general mayhem they can cause, and they have serious potential to wreck an entire gameworld or turn it to their whims.

DMing a doppelganger sometime soon? Go and watch John Carpenter’s The Thing, then read The Things by David Watts. That’s the level of headgame mindfuckedness you should be aiming for.

17 Favorite Animal/Vermin

Animal or vermin, which is it? Once again, my D&D knowledge roll is a failure. I’ll go with animal and say I always liked the idea of cave oxen, herds of musk ox-like herbivores roaming the ginourmous caverns of the underdark. Adventurers are prone to see them as a food source, that is until a stampede of these creatures cause a TPK or something near it.

18 Favorite Immortal/Outsider

I have no idea what an outsider is (Ralph Macchio’s Pony-Boy comes to mind), but as for immortals, there was a monster that looked like a blue-skinned Mr. T from 2e D&D that I loved. I forget the name, but they were like the cosmic merchants called the Devourers from the old Fafhrd & Grey Mouser tale ‘The Bazaar of the Bizarre.” 

Although some of my friends didn’t like idea of some mystic giants setting up stores and cafes in a dungeon as it was ‘unrealistic’, I think unrealistic is a critique that falls pretty flat in a game about dungeons and freakin’ dragons. It was also a fun way to have a ‘save point/store’ in the middle of a tediously long delve.